R.I.P.
TW: suicidal ideation & attempts
In an alternate timeline, I just killed myself.
The concept of quantum immortality was first introduced to me by one of my favourite TV shows, Community, in an episode titled Remedial Chaos Theory in which the timeline gets split and some versions of the characters die. There's been quite a few times now, besides a few hours ago, that I've gotten close to ending it all. I'm almost positive I died earlier this year when I held a knife up to myself, a couple years prior where I gathered all the oxycodone I could find post-surgery, and many more years before that looking down at speeding cars. Unfortunately, miraculously, miserably, I still appear to haunt the realm of the living.
Something about holidays really exacerbates familial tensions. You kind of have to laugh at the irony of screaming at your child to shut up because it's Christmas. I think more christians should live more aligned with their supposed values. It would do them good to remember the helpful acronym; WWBJD (What Would Baby Jesus Do?) I personally highly doubt Baby Jesus would continue to body shame his daughter in response to them saying "please stop commenting on my weight and how my clothes fit".
I think they want me dead. I think I want me dead. Mellow holidays, everyone.
Listening: Inbred & Preacher's Daughter - Ethel Cain